Thursday, June 16, 2011

Wonder Woman, Batgirl, and sex changes.

I must've been five or six at the time.

Playing around inside the house, I grabbed onto the doorframe and did a high-kick into the air.

"See," I said to my oldest brother, "I'm like Batgirl!" (Yvonne Craig used to do ballet-type kicks when fighting bad guys on the Batman TV show).

(How FABULOUS is this costume!)

To which my brother meanly replied, "What, do you want to get a sex change?"

It was at that moment of being shamed that I learned it was "uncool" and unacceptable for boys to want to emulate girls. A lesson that would be repeatedly taught by other males while growing up.

While I never had the desire to play with dolls as a kid (it was typically Legos and action figures for me), I always found myself being drawn to female characters on TV. I watched G.I. Joe, Transformers, and He-Man but She-Ra too.

In high school it was all about Sailor Moon and reruns of Wonder Woman (which I'd originally seen as a child).

Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman!

Then Jean Grey of the X-Men soon followed and in college Xena and La Femme Nikita after that.

These were strong, capable women that made the world a better place and I wanted to be like them!

It almost became an obsession of sorts. Maybe it was because growing up closeted and gay that I identified more with women than men. After all, I was attracted to guys and wanted them to want me, just like a heterosexual woman would.

Even now as an adult I still carry some of that childhood shame. Careful not to mention too much She-Ra and Sailor Moon stuff around certain people for fear of being called "gay".

And yet, there are times when my Wonder Woman notebook used for work isn't hidden under my arm but proudly held in my hand for everyone to see.

One of these days I'm going to say, "See, I'm like Batgirl!" and be as proud as can be.


Brian Miller said...

I hope that day comes for you.

My son went through a period where he really identified with female heroes.

WOL said...

I was given a toy ironing board for xmas which I turned upside down to make a sailing boat and went sailing about on the carpet ocean -- I was continually being told, that's not how you're supposed to play with that! I would much rather play with the boys as their games were so much more fun that playing "house" or dolls. I always thought it would be cool to be Superman. When I watched Roy Rodgers movies, it wasn't Dale Evans I wanted to be like. Girls weren't supposed to like the kind of books I read. I actually had librarians asked me if I'd somehow picked up somebody else's books by mistake, or offer to show me where the books that were suitable for my grade level were. Don't feel like the lone stranger, my friend. There's a lot of us out there, only we've learned the value of protective coloration and how to blend in. It's a survival skill you learn early.

david said...

how cool do you look in that photo...

~ cheers....

Mind Of Mine said...

In school when we played games, I was the Pink Ranger, I didn't care what anyone else thought.

I could have written this post, I feel the exact same way. There is something about females kicking ass that gets my blood flowing.

But you forgot to mention 'Buffy'.

Dean Grey said...


I hope so too!



LOL at using a turned-over, toy ironing board as a sailing boat!

Too cute!



I don't know. How cool?


Mind Of Mine!

Ian, I never really watched Buffy when it was on TV for some reason. Even to this day I've only caught a few episodes.

I know I've got to go back and watch them all!


I appreciate the input from all of you!


Rosie said...

Well, you have the soul of batgirl. That counts.

sMacThoughts said...

times are changing... people are, too. Keep your high-kick warmed up for the big celebration when you finally feel you no longer have to hide who you are from anyone..... we visitors all know you are pretty great!

Dean Grey said...


How sweet of you to say!



I'm keeping my high-kick warmed up!


Thanks to both of you awesome ladies!


dan said...

ha. I was a huge Dazzler reader growing up. still have almost every issue. :P

BosGuy said...

How you doing Dean? All good? Enjoying your summer?

Dean Grey said...


I'm not surprised as Dazzler has really cool powers!



With work and this intense heat bringing me down, it's been rough.

But thanks for asking, sir. Hopefully you're doing much better than me!


I appreciate both of you gentlemen stopping by!


Anonymous said...

this has suffering sappho written all over it....

~ cheers..

Dean Grey said...




tamayn said...

It's kind of funny though that guys are supposed to like GI Joe and He Man. All I ever remember playing was taking off their shirts and staring at their chest, the 12 inch tall ones that is. Realizing it now, Flint really was what I have been looking for in a man all these years.

Dean Grey said...


I did the EXACT same thing with my brothers WWF figures!



Anonymous said...

This is one of my favorites of your posts. The conclusion is fantastic.

Dean Grey said...


I'm happy to hear that!


Jules said...

So how come it's ok for girls to love watching things like Spiderman, Superman and Hercules, but not ok for a boy to love Batgirl?

I'm sure I even pretended to be as strong as Superman when I was a little girl.

I say it doesn't matter what you love, be who you are. Period.

Dean Grey said...


I shall be who I of these days!

Thanks for the support, girl!